When Did The Puppy Turn Into A Miniature Horse?

going on holiday puppy, leaving puppy for two weeks, man vs dog, my puppy has forgotten me, my puppy has quadrupled in size, newfypoo growth spurt, puppy forgetting you, puppy recognition, timon singh

“Um… bigger…”

I may be exaggerating a bit but in the two weeks I’ve been away (Japan and New Zealand – it was lovely, thanks for asking), it appears that CJ has quadrupled in size. No longer is she the small, fluffy puppy I left behind, but instead a large, fluffy dog that if she wanted could probably pick up and run away with a small child. Please note, I am not training CJ to pick up and run away with small children. Yet.

Don’t get me wrong, she is not yet full size and I am not yet able to ride her to work, but she is leaping on and off sofas without fear, can almost scramble over the baby gate and is no longer able to be lifted up with one hand.

When I was away, I would receive messages from Helen such as: “CJ keeps sitting at the foot of stairs barking. I can only assume she thinks you’ve been in bed for 3 days….!” and “she keeps sitting and pawing at your seat on the sofa”, so upon my return I was expecting a bit of a hero’s welcome.

I didn’t get it.

going on holiday puppy, leaving puppy for two weeks, man vs dog, my puppy has forgotten me, my puppy has quadrupled in size, newfypoo growth spurt, puppy forgetting you, puppy recognition, timon singh

“I can now kill ducks.”

After casually noticing my return and chewing on my trainers, CJ returned to eating some chicken… before burping in my face. It seemed that I had fallen down the power ladder of my own home. Helen was now Alpha and I was “that guy that used to live here but now I’ve taken his spot on the sofa.”

However 48 hours after my return, I think memories of my awesomeness are beginning to return. She bounds up on the sofa next to me, demands to play tug of war and, should I not give her my undivided attention, dribbles on my netbook or the TV remote.

It does appear in my absence that Helen has noted my comments from the Six Week Appraisal and done her best to remove the ‘dog odour’ – hence the presence of the amusingly titled ‘Bitch Spray’. However, there is still that lingering smell of dog – most often because CJ is sitting right in front of me, eager for some attention.

We’ll see. For now, I’m more concerned with catching up on work, sleep and Spooks but I’m sure our occasional walks will resume at some point. Unless it continues to rain. In that case, Helen better grab her waterproof.

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About Timon Singh

Timon Singh lives in Bristol, England with his girlfriend Helen Harfield. He is a graduate of Liverpool University where he received a degree in Social and Economic History. He is currently a Creative Copywriter and does freelance work for Den of Geek and Inhabitat. An avid film geek, he can often be found on his sofa basking in the power of his home cinema system. He can also be found on Twitter: @timonsingh
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